President Trump would actually be a good thing for humanity
The Donald Trump inauguration drinking game
January 20, 2017
*sigh* So here we are. Yes... This is a thing we have to deal with. Donald Trump is going to be President of the United States of 'Murica. But, when life gives you lemons… something something tequila.
For those who don't know what an inauguration is, it's a ceremony to celebrate (or at least it's supposed to) when the president-elect becomes president. It's OK. We'll get through this together.
The Rules
This game is a mix of drinking rules and doing rules. Do them all, do a few, pick your favourites, enjoy! MAKE DRINKING GREAT AGAIN! Like it ever stopped...
If George W. Bush looks like he has no idea what is going on
Duck an imaginary shoe AND drink.
If you don't understand the shoe reference
Drink.
If you forget the shoe
Drink.
Bill Clinton is on screen OR mentioned
Play your imaginary saxamaphone with sound effects. Those who forget… drink.
If the Mormon Tabernacle Choir doesn’t inspire you into fits of spiritual devotion
Play Marry, Fuck, Kill. Or drink. Or both. But if you are inspired, that’s cool too.
The Rockettes are mentioned or there's a preview of them
Get up, high kick (as best you can) and drink. No spills.
Every time a Rockette looks like they have a gun to their head and is being told "smile or die"
Drink.
If you get bored and zone out
No punishment. There will be boring bits. Make a cup of tea, go to the loo, share this post with your friends and tell them how great it is. Whatever makes you happy.
Hilary clenches her jaw
Drink.
IF Trumpo's toupee blows off
The game is over. We all win.
Every time Trump looks like a smug-evil-genius-goldfish.
Drink.
Every time something racist, sexist, homophobic, ageist or transphobic is hinted at but not actually said
Drink.
Every time you see Patrick Bateman's face staring out of Mike Pence's cold, dead eyes
Drink. And say five Hail Marys. Not really. But better to be safe than dead.
You had no idea who Jackie Evancho, Toby Keith, John Voight, The Piano Guys, Lee Greenwood or DJ Ravidrums are until this moment
You don't need to drink. No one knows who they are.
The D-Man pervs on Jackie Evancho
Drink. She's 16 btw. Ew.
If you are old enough to remember 3 Doors Down
Have a drink, grandma.
If you picked up that this inauguration is a major whitewashed sausage fest and that doesn’t surprise you at all
Drown your sorrows in alcohol. It’s bullshit.
Michelle Obama looks like she disapproves and is ready to serve some sass
Charge your glass, scream "All hail the Queen!" and chug! #Michelle2020
When the helicopter comes along to collect the Obamas
Drink and do your best helicopter sounds WITH your drink in your mouth.
If you make it all the way to the end...
Order a pizza and take a nap. Shit-fest is over.
Neither the author nor Hijacked encourage dangerous drinking habits. Know your limits and be safe. If you pass out, Trump wins.
--
Annabel Sweetnam-Groom
Annabel is a Journalism graduate who is completing her Law and Criminology degrees and a Modern History minor at Murdoch. She enjoys whisky, pizza, and sleeping.
