Seven feels postgrad students can relate to

May 31, 2017
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Often over-looked, perpetually self-satisfied and forever rumpled, post-grads are a league amongst themselves.

Feeling superior to just about everyone else around you

Them feels when you get to say “Oh yeah, I already have a degree.” There is something so smugly satisfying about knowing you’ve done it all before. Even if it’s a completely different discipline you’re currently working on, the fact you know you can do it makes this uni garb so much easier.

Being totes chilled about assignments and exams

Because you have exhausted all those jitters and, let’s be honest, figured out how to decipher the hidden meanings in unit guides, tutes, and lectures, besides actually getting them done, you’re a cucumber person. As in cool. as. a.

And it feels so freakin’ good doing that slow-mo, pure haughty, calmer than thou, strut, while everyone is freaking out, on fire and/or crying.

Being semi-sociable with lecturers/tutors

Having the confidence to speak to them like they’re a person and not sound sucky-uppy like they’re a “teacher” is a skill, not often bestowed upon first degreers. And by God, does it pay off. If you play your cards right, they’ll give a whole range of wonderful insights into upcoming assignments, tests, and exams. Praise thee! Also, if you manage to burrow your name and face into their brains (metaphorically, don’t be gross) they may even be willing to be a reference for when you EVENTUALLY leave adult daycare.

Being cynical AF

You’ve been here before. You recognise that tree. All these little darlings doing their first degrees… So wide-eyed, optimistic, eager to please, high on life, and trying so flippin’ hard to uni. Bless. But you are not about that life. You’re over in the corner, sucking down your fourth expresso, scowling at their chemical-free energy and happiness. And then they have the audacity to say “These are the best years of our lives!” These are the best years of my life? Better fucking not be.

Your family (and basically everyone you know) constantly bugging you about when you’re going to finish

Errgghhhh, like sorry I’m going to be really qualified and specialised in my chosen field. Unfortunately, they don’t just give degrees away to just anyone. You kinda have to earn it and there is only so much you can do to speed it up, even if you are doing ALL the intensive units during the holidays and overloading. You’ll get there when you get there.

Knowing how to handle group assignments

Those unaware of the perils of group assignments may think this is a great experience to make friends and learn some teamwork skills. No! This is not RuPaul’s Best Friend and Teamwork Skills Drag Race! You already know the T. And get straight into doing all the damn work yourself.

Being so so so so soooooo over this education shtick

Kindy, primary school, middle school, high school, uni - will it ever end!? By the time I’ve finished my studies I will have spent around 20 years in education institutions. I thought I’d be smarter… It’s slightly disheartening when all your friends, with their full-time jobs and avocados are complaining about the nine-to-five grind, and you’re sitting there, glaring at them, wishing you could buy a new sponge that is actually able to scrub. Snooty bastards…

Annabel Sweetnam-Groom

Annabel is a Journalism graduate who is completing her Law and Criminology degrees and a Modern History minor at Murdoch. She enjoys whisky, pizza, and sleeping.

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