Five things anyone working in retail can relate to

February 02, 2016
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Balancing study and work is never a fun time, but a job is a job and we need to fund those adventurous weekends, right? Just imagine the beauty of being able to buy real food ‘cause of the extra zeroes in that bank account. Better yet, think of all the extra goon bags you’d be able to splash out on. Let’s face it: no uni student can really stand the taste of hard liquor.

So, retail it is. All you suckers (including myself) just have to learn to put your big-girl pants on and suck it up. And you gotta remember, this is actually for the rest of your life. Here’s the 411 on what life is like while you study, work and try to build your empire.

Everyone thinks you only work retail

“What do you do with yourself?” Ugh, I swear if one more customer asks this in the most obviously condescending tone, they’re gonna get hit. Most days I feel like screaming over the counter that I GO TO UNIVERSITY, and that they better remember that one day my fellow retail workers and I will be the ones paying your income. You better #respect, mate.

“Can you come in for a lunch cover?” Yeah, nah, I have class

The lunch covers are possibly the best thing since sliced bread. Three hours of paid bliss where you probably spend the whole time doing stock. The only real problem is that most classes are in the middle of the day, which leads to the dreaded ‘no’ to the pay that’d get you through a fabulous night out that weekend. Ditching class can be a favourite pastime for many students, but missing the same class every week is somewhat noticeable.

Say ‘yes’ once, and you’ll always be remembered as a saviour. Someone nail you to a cross, hey.

Say ‘goodbye’ to days off

Imagine having the best possible timetable known to man and doing your happy dance, only to realise that you made a deal with the devil to gain some extra dosh. You may only do a lunch cover on those glorious ‘me time’ days, but hanging around all day waiting for that dreaded shift is the be-all and end-all. JUST LEAVE US TO LIVE OUR PROCRASTINATION FILLED LIVES.

If you try your hardest though, you may just hit the jackpot and be able to work around your classes and earn a beautiful day all to yourself. What a wonderful life.

Saturday nights out are fab - unless you have to work Sunday trade

Like it isn’t a lie that Sunday pay is what dreams are made of. When you’re a uni student who lives for a good Saturday night, however, it’s a choice between two evils. I guess in a perfect world one could do both, right? Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Work on a Sunday feels like a Dementor has touched your soul. Add in a killer hangover, and you might as well be handing yourself over to the Dark Lord. The world of retail is not merciful to us innocent partygoers, so I guess you’ll have to find your fun some other way. Maybe try looking after your body? Nah, I’m good actually.

Those discounts though…

Somehow this makes all those torturous hours banging your head along to the company playlist and trying not to stab customers in the eye with a pen all worth it. Cheers, execs, for your generosity!

Allison Byrnes

Allison is a Multimedia Journalism student at James Cook University. She dreams of emulating Julie Bishop's style on a uni student budget.

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